A Place You'll Never Be

[La Gi, 1/27/25]

After seven years, I return to a place you’ll never be. On anyone’s list of 100 Vietnamese cities to visit, you won’t find La Gi (pop 65,000). It does attract domestic tourists who are drawn to a curious temple called Master and Mistress’ Palace [Dinh Thầy Thím].

In his native village in Quang Ngai, 500 miles north, the Master brought rain during a drought and made a temple appear overnight. For these miracles, he was charged with witchcraft by King Gia Long (1777-1802), and condemned to death. Given the choice of decapitation, poison or strangulation, the Master chose the last, but the silk cloth for this became a dragon that delivered him and his wife to La Gi. Though he didn’t walk on water or part the sea, the Master did enough here to cement his reputation as a holy man.

Unlike Diddy, Trump or Elon Musk, the Master didn’t care for fame, so lived in the forest. When he and his wife died, wild beasts buried them. Once a year, two tigers, one black, one white, would visit these graves to weep. At the Master and Mistress’ Palace, there are also statues of these soulful cats.

Ignoring guesthouses by the bus depot, I kept walking. That stretch wasn’t lively enough. I passed the AZ Club, with a huge sign advertising its Tết lineup. There’s Hana Cẩm Tiên, Binh Ho, Ngoc Diem, Thanh Van and Bi86. Five nights in a row, Sexy Dancer Team will also entertain. Putting on my boogie shoes, I’ll hit the dance floor. Tonight, I’ll rock AZ until they call the ambulance or hearse.