Schlock Crooning Barista Wishes He Was A Nurse In Amarillo

[Manila, 4/7/25]

Wandering the streets before 6AM, I could only find people drinking coffee at 7-Eleven, Uncle John’s, McDonald’s and Starbucks. Finally on Kalaw, there’s an American style coffee shop at Comfort Inn. Edward Hopper or Richard Estes would be charmed. Needing Wifi to write this, I walked in. A dark security guard even opened the door. So skinny, he’s not even a straw weight. Unlike many here, he has no pistol in a holster, only a first aid kit above his bony ass. You’ll need it after his six-punch combination. Pancho Villa was a 5-1, 114 pound world champ.

So tough, Villa refused to cancel a fight despite a swollen face due to an ulcerated tooth. Having four teeth pulled days later caused an infection, so Villa died at age 23.

So here I am, eating a croissant that’s cold and hard in the middle. It may have been crafted last month or year. The three baristas have “BARISTA” on the back of their shirts. Hearing another schlocky American tune, the male one started to sing. He wouldn’t be out of place in a Saigon or Macao nightclub. Suddenly, the music stopped! In Tokyo yesterday, trading on the Nikkei was halted to prevent further collapse.